Monday, January 28, 2013

The Day that Changed Our Family Forever.....

                 There have been many events that have occurred in my childhood that have changed my perspective of  of how I view adults. The one that stands out the most is the day that changed our family forever.  I just returned  from a play date with our next door  neighbor. My mother had been cleaning house all day. We used to live in a 3500 square feet ,three story house which consisted of a library, living room, dinning room,entrance parlor, and  kitchen, on first floor and five bedrooms and 3 bathrooms upstairs plus the basement and  laundary room on lower level. The house was massive and required a full day to clean. As we entered, I saw that my Dad was intoxicated, slurring his words and saying nonsense  accusations.  Talking nonsense was the usual  way he would appear when he drank.  My neighbor asked my mom if she wanted  me to go over to their house for a little while longer  but my mom  embarrassed of my dad drunk conditions,  in front of the neighbor, declined. I was a little upset because I didn't want to be around my dad. He is such a completely different man when he is under the influence of alcohol. 
            My mom went into the kitchen  to continue her chores and my dad followed her. I went into our library and overheard them  argue. I heard something shatter but did not think anything of it. I couldn't take the arguing any more.  So I decided to head upstairs to my room. As I set my foot on the first step I hear my mom yelling " Call 9 1 1". I run up the stairs.  The set of stairs felt like they were never going to end. I finally reach the phone dial 911 and told  the operator I needed  help and gave  her my address. 
       A police officer  immediately  arrived and I ran down the stairs to let him in. He goes into the kitchen and to my surprise I saw my dad attempting to shove my moms face to hit the kitchen marble floor. The officer arrests my dad.and puts him in handcuffs. As he is escorted to the police car, he keeps repeating he loved his wife and it was self defense. .  The paramedics arrive, they tend to my mom. She is put on a stretcher and we head to the hospital. After that incident my mom made up her mind that it was time to file for divorce.  She had put up with his verbal abuse for  twenty-three years of marriage but would not tolerate physical abuse, especially as she really thought  she was going to die that day.
          My dad went around telling everyone that my mom tried to hurt him and it was self defense.  He played the victim and wanted everyone's sympathy vote. During the duration of the divorce and still  to this day he talks  negative about my mom.Yet my mother has never spoken bad about him , she says actions speaks stronger than words. She may think of all the horrible things he has done but never attempts to speak or put us against him.
        The event of my dad harming my mom and lying to people about what he had done  forever changed the way I saw adults. In my mind , I saw adults especially your parents as people who are  there to protect you. They are the one who teach you not to lie,and  they  always say they want whats best for you. The fact that my own dad tried to take the life of his wife, mother of his children, a woman who supported all his dreams and work along side him with the family business  and then lied about it showed me that people are not always what they seem.  Here was a man who stood out in the social circle of affluent friends, community and business associates, who had charisma and influential power with others, continued to pretend that what he did was justifiable. This impacted my life in many ways in the manner that adults may pretend to be what they are not.

Monday, January 21, 2013



 My first childhood memory is the time I broke my left arm because I was climbing a tree. The house that we lived in had this enormous tree in the front yard. My older brother and his friends would always climb it and it looked like it was so much fun. One summer day my neighbor and I were playing outside. I had this brilliant idea that we should climb the tree. She climbed the tree with no problem and made it look so easy. It was my turn to climb the tree I had a little bit of anxiety but I was determined to climb this tree. I started to climb and my anxiety decreased. I finally reached the part of the tree that I was able to sit upon. It was the greatest feeling sitting high up in the tree looking down and seeing how far up we were. My neighbor had the idea that we should jump down from the tree. She was able to stand with no problem and jumped from the tree without any hesitation. However me on the other hand I was nervous and scared as I started to stand up on the tree branch I lost my balance and ending up falling from the tree and landing on my left arm. I was in a significant amount of pain. However, I was in a fear to tell my mom what had happened. I finally went inside and told her that I fell out of the tree. She immediately took me to the hospital and they did an x ray. My arm was indeed broken, the best of part of this whole ordeal was being able to wear a pink cast.